Retirement 102, 103 and 104
My last column, Am I happy now? elicited several responses from readers. George from Rehoboth wrote, “When you first retire coworkers ask for advice…over time that changes, and one day you awaken to the fact that you have become irrelevant. You see yourself and your place in the world differently. Even holidays are different. Thanksgiving and Christmas are no longer at your house…and all they expect you to do is show up and keep smiling.”
Kathleen in Lewes shared, “I’m only six months into retirement but I think…what it comes down to is a beautiful opportunity for personal growth. In my working life, all the growing I did was focused on becoming a better mom or to be better in my career…but we face a jarring transition.”
Months ago Sharon from Cadbury told me that she needed Retirement 103 or 104 columns because she was way past the honeymoon stage and couldn’t relate to some of the issues new retirees face.
I recall visiting a friend in a nursing home a few years ago and I noticed these placards on the outside of every room. They were detailed biographies of each occupant’s life. One woman named Beatrice, age 91, had been a renowned pianist, while another man’s sign boasted of his scientific inventions. As I was reading his biography, the door gently opened and a frail man ushered out with his walker. The shellacked poster lent dignity as it reminded visitors of the man’s life thus far, yet somehow it seemed inadequate.
I feel like George when it comes to the holidays. I was the hostess, purveyor of the turkey, the tablecloths, and the china. I adored this role! All of that changed when I retired and moved to Delaware. But my children are married now and struggle to accommodate two families. They don’t even want my Franciscan china. Don’t they realize it is featured in the Smithsonian? However, there is some relief in simply showing up with the cranberry salad, a family recipe requested by my nephew and his husband. And they want my china!
Change is constant, I am reminded as I pack up my belongings to move into a new home. What to do with my father’s World War II uniform? Thanks to the people at Fort Miles, I was able to connect with Donald G. Hattier at the Wings and Wheels event held in Georgetown a few weeks ago. An impressive military setup is open to help educate the public about World War II, including an original medical tent and artifacts. Donald took the medals from my hand and explained what each one represented. “This blue one in the shape of a rifle means he fired his weapon.” I know. He was a paratrooper who landed on the beaches of Normandy, I tell Donald. He takes the pins and ribbons from my hand.
Next Donald held up my father’s Army pants and said, “Thanks. One of our Boy Scouts can wear these at our next military setup.” I feel I have honored my father’s service in some minute way.
Happy Halloween, everyone! Please don’t forget to vote or thank our veterans whose service is relevant to all of us.
