Who really comes home for homecoming?

Assault with a deadly - Let's kick it real. No one comes home for homecoming, and if you're out of school from five years to 50 and show up at the Homecoming Dance, you are beyond way lame, you are hobbled beyond help. Back in 1974, I was the head coach at a school for emotionally disturbed teenagers and we were on the bus on the way to play Glenn Mills, which at that time was a straight-up reform school. My players started to get more nervous the closer we got to the field, especially when I told them it was Homecoming and to be careful when getting knocked out of bounds. I also told them last year's winning float was 'Assault with a Deadly' and featured a big linebacker crushing a running back while wearing an arm cast. The reality was that Glenn Mills had 75 players in uniform but all the big fat ones played skill positions because they couldn't see the value in blocking for others. I had never seen a 6-foot-5, 290-pound fat guy play quarterback, and all he did was throw long, but his receivers would go get the ball because like a Middle Eastern dictator, they were tired of getting overthrown. We won, players chanting “We're number one” on the ride home getting ready to play Pennsylvania School for the Deaf the following week, a game we lost on a fake punt. I only wish it weren't true.

Parent takes advice - I don't see a lot of African-American women playing soccer, and have never seen one officiating a boys' game until the Oct. 11 match at Cape in which the Vikings hosted Lake Forest. Tammy Dawson learned soccer because her daughter was a player at Caesar Rodney and also played travel ball, so Tammy, who had never played, became a student of the game. “Somebody said I was on the calls before the officials, so I should become one, and two years ago I did,” she said. Tammy is 40, looks 18, and is light on her feet and can actually get to the spot of the offsides and fouls. Like all good officials, she made calls and got along with half the people after making them.

Buckle up and stay focused - Cape has played in more homecoming games over the last 10 years than any other team in Delaware. That's because teams generally wrap homecoming weekend around a football game they expect to win. Last season, Cape played homecoming road games at Caesar Rodney, Dover and Sussex Central. The year before, Laurel scheduled Cape for homecoming while Cape chose Dover, which hung 56 points on the Vikings. Here's the deal: 70 percent of students don't care about the homecoming court, and why should they? Show me a football coach who likes homecoming and I'll show you a guy who prances on the elliptical orbiter when working out. Dover is a team not unlike the Philadelphia Eagles. They have some crazy good talent as they showed beating St. Mark's 34-24 on Sept. 24; it was the Spartans' homecoming. Evidently they just wanted to get it over with. Dover also lost to Salesianum 38-0 and Sussex Central 20-13. Sussex Central lost to St. Mark's 42-21. Dover is a tough out, and a win will ice Cape's first winning season in the last 10 years.

Dragster Dill - Jordan Dill is a senior at Sussex Tech and a varsity lacrosse player. He is also the three-time U.S. 13 Junior Dragster champion with a pit crew of Dills - sounds like a pickle barrel - that includes his father John and grandfather Sudler. Jordan and his crew just completed a four-weekend, eight-race Raider ET series racing in Maryland and Virginia. The weekend of Oct. 7-9, Jordan and his crew, racing at Maryland International Raceway in Mechanicsville, nailed down the dragster championship with a dramatic first-place finish.

Snippets - The Eagles at 1-4 are close to a two-point favorite on the road at 3-1 Washington this Sunday, Oct. 16. The Redskins have beaten the Giants, Cardinals and Rams. The Eagles should have beaten the Falcons, Giants and Bills. Do you understand that gambler's logic? The Homecoming Hoopfest 3-on-3 Basketball Tournament will be held starting at 11 a.m., Saturday, Oct. 15, at Cape High. There are middle school, high school and open age divisions. Call coach Stephen Re at 410-430-7832 or email him at Stephen.Re@cape.k12.de.us to register.

Gave blood last week as member of the Lifesavers Club. “Your blood pressure is 110/70; you are very relaxed, “ the woman said, then she stuck my finger and was somewhat aghast, “but your hemoglobin is borderline high.” Hemoglobin, we talkin' hemoglobin, like I'm going to google "borderline high hemoglobin" disorder. Not me, perhaps I'm just watching too much plasma television. You a sports fan? Call Comcast, say you want the sports package and to drop something else to make it come out even. That's what I did, cost me nothing, now I'm back watching the Redzone channel. Go on now, git!